It’s Just A Funk !!

Sooooo… I have not checked my blog for 6 days.. That’s a first since I started my blog back in October. In fact it’s also been several day’s since I even checked my email account.

I have been in a funk, a heavy funk in fact. There are several blog posts I have started and saved for the future. One is about rape another about my friend that passed away and my death experiences when I was stabbed.

My thoughts have been with a friend that passed recently , the questions I have about God, and mesothelioma. Also when August approaches each year I have a tendency to withdraw. My birthday is less then a week away and I hate that time of year. It’s depressing, not just because I am aging but birthdays as a child were horrible. I have been missing some family member’s especially my grandson Anthony. I feel like the clock is ticking to fast and time is running out for me in this life. I just don’t know how to fix anything !!!

I was blessed Thursday and Friday with the company of a friend and his partner that visited us from Renton Washington. We have been friends for 9 years and he is the most positive person I have ever met. He feels like I am not allowing my true personality to show in my blog. The funny part, the part of me that has so many friends and supporters that really enjoy my company.

Because I don’t feel much self worth it’s hard for me to look at myself the way others do. So he is going to help me with some posts in a couple weeks that I hope will bring laughter to my readers.

I checked my email account this morning  and there was an email from a regular blog reader asking me if I had stopped blogging. She also told me how much strength she has gained from reading my blog. This reader was attacked and stabbed 28 times and survived. That is why I blog , to help others gain strength. I try and give messages of hope in all the darkness that my blog contains.

Have a beautiful Sunday !!

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This entry was posted in Child Abuse, Depression, Dysfunctional Family Relationships, Healing and Recovery, PTSD, Toxic Relationships and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

17 Responses to It’s Just A Funk !!

  1. JackieP says:

    You are missed. And you make a difference in a positive way. Never forget that. Hugs on this Sunday.

    • Thanks Jackie, And hugs on this Monday.. Sometimes its hard for me to snap out of a funk and think about all the funny happy moments that have brought so much cheer to my life.

  2. Sorry things have been so hard. 😦 Add in funny but when you feel able keep blogging about the real stuff too! xo

  3. prewitt1970 says:

    Hope you have a beautiful Sunday as well. You are an inspiration to so many whether you realize it or not. To myself included.
    Sincerely
    Benjamin

    • Thank you Ben, Sometimes when I get in that dark funky place its hard to be positive. The last few months have been such a challenge. I appreciate your uplifting words. Hope you are well.

      • prewitt1970 says:

        Thanks I’m well enough it’s a hr by hr life but I’m alive 🙂 I’m sorry for your dark place, I understand in my own way. Best wishes to you on this fine day.
        Sincerely
        Benjamin

  4. To have been through what you’ve been through shows you’re a very strong person, which is something I admire. Your blog gives hope, because it shows that a person can get through absolutely anything and still be successful and happy in life.

    • Thank you , I am trying to get to the happy place 🙂 The challenges of recent months have been overwhelming and a huge distraction. I am beginning to feel focused again and looking forward to re-connecting with all the wonderful friends I have that are so supportive.

  5. I was wondering if you just took a break? I find you very inspiring and insightful, just be you! Have a wonderful day as well!

    • Kind of a break I didn’t want !! The chaos has been removed from my home and I have a new therapist, I am back in the saddle again… looking forward to catching up on what I need to be accomplishing and moving forward in a positive direction.

  6. Melanie says:

    You do have a wonderful sense of humor. It would not damage the integrity of your blog or your message to allow a bit more of you shine through. You’ve survived so much with humility and humor in tact.

  7. I kinda figured what the absence was from. I was going to give you a few more days, then come looking harder. Peace be with you. I will be glad to listen if you still need to rant or rave.
    Scott

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