2 In, 2 Out

Two-in

There should always be (at least) two firefighters together when they enter a location that is considered a hazard area that is considered “Immediately Dangerous to Life or Health” (IDLH), i.e., the interior of the structure fire. Firefighters operating in the hazard area must operate in a Buddy system and maintain voice or visual contact with one another at all times. This assists in assuring accountability within the team. They must operate together as a team the entire time they are in the hazard area. At no time, under any circumstances, are they permitted to separate from one another. If one firefighter has to exit the hazard area, for any reason, such as their air supply getting low, they must both exit.

The above info is credited to Wikipedia.

Eighteen years of team work through thick and thin is what Ronnie and I have experienced. As we prepare for our move out-of-state, my thoughts race with emotion. Anger rages within my being. The unconscionable behavior my children displayed toward Ronnie is still raw and fresh. I have a very difficult time releasing some of the past that hurt, and haunts my husband.

During a discussion Ronnie and I were engaged in Saturday, Ronnie said, “Those kids ruined that for me.” We were talking about a very specific career Ronnie would enjoy. I feel so responsible for their behavior. After several years of therapy, I know I am not responsible for their behavior, but the pain is still there, the salt still pours into the wound, the wound has not healed. Mandi and Anthony together targeted Ronnie. All I could do was to continue to funnel money into the attorneys pocket. I had the same charges, but I really didn’t care about me. Ronnie was my concern.

We were two in and two out. We were thrown into a burning building together and determined to escape together.

Binders marked “Legal” sit on our bedroom closet shelf as a reminder. Instead of a baby book of all things wonderful, we have blue binders of legal documents and receipts for thousands and thousands of dollars spent unnecessarily. We operated as a team the entire time and escaped still breathing.

Together at our lowest low, we prevailed. We have never given up hope or separated. With Gods love and grace and our determination we will succeed.

In the meantime, packing and sorting through years of belongings is for the birds. We have downsized several times and I feel we still have so much “stuff”. It’s all stuff I thought I was attached to. When a person gets their priorities in order and realizes what is most important in life, its amazing what you can live without.

What I felt I needed to have, I no longer care about or need. The material stuff is irrelevant now.

It’s all about two in and two out!

Ronnie and Becki

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This entry was posted in Dysfunctional Family Relationships, family bliss, friendships, gift of love, happiness, leaving the past behind, new beginnings, PTSD, Traumatic Experiences and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

13 Responses to 2 In, 2 Out

  1. JackieP says:

    I found out a long time ago that a person doesn’t need ‘things’. A person needs are met other ways. In things you don’t have to dust.

  2. I sure do not need much these days Jackie. Just a peaceful life.

  3. I’m so glad you have Ronnie! Funny you should talk about firefighting..My Hubby is training as a volunteer firefighter. 😉

  4. Lori Lara says:

    If you can come out of this awful trial together, you have everything. Few people can attest to such faithfulness. Blessings and continued strength to you and your husband.

  5. Abby says:

    That was so beautifully written. Two in Two out. I will make sure that I always think about that when arguing about the petty things with my fiance. I know we will have some hard times coming up when my abuser comes out of prison and as long as I keep that in mind I know we will prevail. You are a beautiful couple.
    There is a Jewish saying that stems from the bible. G-D tells Abraham that he must move from where he is living-“Go from your land and from the home of your fathers.” It is commented that
    G-D tells him this because he is having a hard time from where he is living (he was having issues with the wells and could not feed his flock). From this we have the expression-Mishaneh Makom, MIshaneh Mazal. When translated it means- Change your place, change your luck. I wish this for you with this upcoming move. May your Mazal (luck) change for the best and be blessed with this new place. A new chapter for you and the ones that you love.

    • I love the Jewish saying. I just left the psychiatrist and he said,” I think leaving the bad behind will open wonderful new doors for us.” We only have a little bit longer to wait. I think Ronnie and I will really blossom in our new environment. I am going to love the sun everyday. I will write all about our journey when we leave and take pics.
      Have a beautiful night !

  6. mandy says:

    Beautiful photo of you and Ronnie, Becki. My husband is a retired FF. The buddy system is critical for survival 🙂

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