8270 Days

Nine hundred sixty five days , 965 days between our knife wielding attackers. I was starting to heal, feeling stronger, I landed a great job with the TOPS program in Portland Oregon. My position was assistant case worker for women transitioning from county, state and federal institutions back into the community. TOPS was an impatient program, located in downtown Portland at the YWCA. Yes, I once worked for The Department Of Corrections. I was offered a fantastic compensation package and I loved my position. Outside of having to collect urine samples from our residents to send to Parole and Probation , and an occasional visit from the US Marshalls when called upon to escort a non complying resident back to jail, it was a good gig. My dream was, one day become a therapist for women and children escaping domestic violence. I also was serving on a Board of Director’s as the Chair Of Fundraising at the largest Domestic Violence Resource Center in Washington County. My son’s were in therapy, we were healing from my vicious attack. 

June 12, 1994 Nicole Brown-Simpson and Ronald Goldman were viciously attacked with a knife and left for dead,  I was attacked 965 days prior. I do NOT CARE what any ones opinion is, OJ Simpson killed Nicole and Ron, Robert Kardashian hid evidence that would of convicted OJ.

During my youth I loved football and OJ Simpson was a favorite player of mine. OJ was interviewed on TV regarding Nicole and Ron’s death, I knew OJ killed them. A stranger did not kill Nicole and Ron. My initial gut instinct was why is OJ lying? He killed them, he killed them, end of story! I KNEW with my entire being OJ was guilty, I could see it in his eyes. OJ Simpson is going to prison, he will get the death penalty. My love for OJ turned to hate, over the next few months my contempt and pure hatred for OJ deepened. I knew how it felt to be stabbed, a knife thrusting and gouging my skin deeper and deeper, piercing unbearable pain, each thrust caused blood to spout from every direction covering my body the carpet the walls  while I fought to survive. I was stabbed 21 times. My body was covered from head to toe in gapping wounds. By the grace of God my life was sparred, Nicole and Ron were dead.

I became obsessed with the case against OJ, each and every day I watched TV, the trial, AC Cowlings driving the Bronco down the California freeway with OJ in the back seat. I wanted the police to shoot and kill Simpson, why were the allowing him to make a spectacle of his horrific act. He’s a killer !! My hate grew deeper, at one point I contemplated and thought out a plan to drive to LA and kill him myself. How dare he deny these murders ! How dare the public allow shady high priced attorney’s to possibly convince a jury to set this asshole , narcissistic killer free. I was sickened that any “normal” person actually thought he was innocent.

Over the next few months I feel into a deep depression, I couldn’t stay away from the news, I would scream at OJ’s defenders on TV. Every week I missed work , couldn’t get out of bed away from the TV and trial. My personal life began to fall apart. My friendships deteriorated, I was unable to see that I was self destructing. I felt guilty being alive, why was I sparred and not Nicole and Ron. My anger turned to rage, PTSD took control of me and I was unable to stop my “cleaning binges” , I continued to take my sons to therapy but was unable to make my own therapy appointments. Finally, I was fired from the job and future career I dreamed of. I attempted suicide, waking up to police standing over me while I lay on the side of an old friends house , half way in the bushes. There was no rhyme or reason why I ended up there, I had walked over 3 miles after taking over a hundred pills. I was carrying pictures and a CD of Aaron Neville. A neighbor of my friend saw me laying on the side of the house when he walked down the driveway to retrieve the morning newspaper. The neighbor tried shaking me and I didn’t respond. He called 911 and the fire department and police took over, once again my life was saved. Thank God I had enough sense to not drive my car that night.

It has been 8270 days since I was stabbed, 8270 days ago my life was sparred. I am still furious that OJ was set free, I have a very good idea of the pain Nicole and Ron suffered on June 12, 1994. Tomorrow will be 7305 days ago these beautiful people’s life was cut short over jealousy, its the 20th anniversary.

I have healed and am blessed, why I am still here has yet to be determined. Tomorrow , June 12th take a moment to think of Nicole, Ron, their family and friends. Also take a moment to think of all the domestic violence victims that died and pray that the ones that are still under attack find the strength to escape and live healthy lives.

As far as OJ he will die in prison.

Remember, this is my blog and my feelings, ….I REFUSE TO POST OR ALLOW ANY COMMENTS IN SUPOORT OF OJ NOW OR EVER ON MY BLOG.





This entry was posted in Nicole Brown Simpson, OJ Simpson is a murderer, OJ Simpson jealousy, OJ Simpson prison, Ron Goldman, Suicide and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

11 Responses to 8270 Days

  1. shaunynews says:

    Great blog. We all knew OJ did it. Over here we had only knew of OJ as an actor. No idea he was a sportsman. We all know he was guilty. I remember the verdict, the WHOLE WORLD STOPPED…
    And as a that woman read out the verdict, making mistakes and losing words as she did, it felt like a life time. Then “Not Guilty” I remember me shaking my head and thinking “What have you done here” But this is what money and a good lawyer gets you in this cold world.

    As for you Becki, you came through the unthinkable and are here, happy, devoted to family, loving, caring and a real person with real feelings.

    I am so proud of you and it is my honour to know you and Ron..

    Shaun x

    • The whole trial was a shit show Shaun, completely unjust and full of cover ups. Both his lawyers knew he was guilty. Kardashian removed a black bag full of who knows what from OJ’s house. Kardashian never disclosed where or what was in that bag. The list goes on and on. Kardashian died at 59 years old in 2003 and Cochran died at 67 in 2005. AC Cowlings knows exactly what happened and he went bankrupt and resorted to selling women’s handbags. To this day AC is depressed and refuses to say a word about the long Bronco ride with OJ. Our system failed Nicole, Ron and our entire country. Before the evil sinister human dies in prison I hope he will make good with the families. You are a wonderful friend Shaun and we as well as proud to call you friend.

      • shaunynews says:

        Yeah looking back it was a sad day. But this happens in courts all over the World sadly. Money can buy you anything. I guess OJ got what was due to him in the end..


      • It sure does Shaun the entire system is a mess. If you study the crime , you find that in MOST cases involving a knife and an attack like this case was, is a crime of passion. OJ was angry that Nicole was not interested in a relationship any longer. He wanted her and he was used to having what he wanted, whenever he wanted. The word “no” was not a word he accepted. He saw her with a friend, and stabbed them to death. One stab would to the heart if it was a planned attack. He was caught off guard. He was stalking her. A random intruder most likely would of had a gun and probably not took on 2 people at one time.

      • shaunynews says:

        Yeah that makes perfect sense…
        Was a frenzied jealous attack by what you say and by what I read (I actually just watched some video’s about it and read up a little) after I seen this.


      • Shaun, OJ was in a rage he couldn’t accept that his former wife no longer wanted him. He is a narcissist to the highest degree. The great OJ Simpson that society portrayed greater than God could not control Nicole and he was unable to deal with that fact. On many occasions he showed up at her door and pushed his way in, he had beat her in the past, broke into her condo, and he should of been arrested. Any other person would have been arrested on the spot. There are recordings of 911 calls with Nicole pleading to the 911 operator to dispatch the police quickly because Nicole was scared for her life. During those calls you can hear OJ in the background in a rage.

  2. zentalfloss says:

    I know something about the players in this. I used to work with a woman who just happened to be the wife of OJ’s business attorney. She attended many of the parties and was very reluctant to give her opinion during the trial, but she did intimate that a lot of drugs were taken at these so-called “family” parties. And, more oddly, our receptionist was the daughter of the jury foreperson. The primary thing about this case were three things: 1. I’d say the “fix” was in from the beginning as the District Attorney had the option of just charging OJ, or bringing it to the Grand Jury; due to taking it to the Grand Jury, the case ended up in downtown Los Angeles, not on the westside where it belonged. This meant the jury pool was radically different. 2. The DA also assigned Marcia Clark and (now I’m showing MY age as I can’t recall the other assistant DA) – but neither were as experienced as they needed to be to handle a high profile case like this; it was theirs to lose and they lost it; and 3. Race. I still live in the LA area, but also worked in the legal profession for decades both in Century City and Downtown LA (I was a paralegal). But the race divide was completely played out in this case – every single black person I talked to about this felt OJ was set up, every white person felt he was guilty. As far as I’m concerned he was and it was a true miscarriage of justice. But with factors one and two above, there was really no way to prevail, especially because we already had a history in this city of race riots after verdicts (remember Rodney King? THAT was ugly.) As to exhibit tampering, I’ve heard some stuff about Bob Kardashian and the other attorneys. Probably the only above board attorney was the first one, Robert Shapiro, but he withdrew very quickly. As far as I’m concerned the DA at the time was probably paid off (and yes, I can’t remember HIS name, either!). It is unfortunate that justice doesn’t always prevail – but thankfully, it usually does. It’s an imperfect system.

    • Thank you for taking the time to comment. I can’t remember the “DA’s” name either, Christopher Darden was Marcia Clarks assistant. Yes Shapiro resigned from the case. At one point F. Lee Bailey was involved in the defense team. I do remember Rodney King, that was ugly and racism was very prevalent in LA. I can tell you that all my close Black friends from Chicago thought he was guilty. My Mother-in-law and Brother-in-law are black and they both said, “Why did OJ go and kill that beautiful woman”, my husband is Black and he also agrees OJ killed Nicole and Ron. My husband did bounce around between was it OJ or someone he paid, possibly maybe even his son Jason. It’s a very imperfect system, in the end OJ showed his true colors and how violent he is on multiple occasions since 1994. He is exactly where he should be rotting in prison.

      • zentalfloss says:

        Hi Becki:
        I agree that not all black people believe he wasn’t guilty, but during this time in Los Angeles, it sure seemed that way. I was surprised that it was 20 years ago! Take good care, Laura

      • Laura, There definitely was a divide. The entire justice system in LA sure screwed up with this case. I believe the media was responsible in many ways for causing a divide between people. It doesn’t seem like 20 years ago to me either. You take care and again thanks for stopping by.

  3. Jueseppi B. says:

    Reblogged this on The ObamaCrat™.

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